I feel good.
I feel whole.
I feel complete.
I feel more than enough even though I am not enough for you.
I am more than you.
More than what you think of me.
I may not be the best
But I am the best for myself.
Does that make sense?
No?
Well, it makes sense to me.
My brain has hundreds thoughts a minute.
Sometimes
It doesn’t have any thought at all
Except for in the moment.
Does that make sense?
No?
Well, it makes sense to me.
I can’t do this no more.
Not loving myself enough.
Giving myself more to you than to me.
Does that make sense?
No?
Well, it makes sense to me.
Your warm body
Is what I want but not what I need.
I need your heart, open.
Open to accept my love.
Open to accept the broken pieces of me.
Does that make sense?
No?
Well, it makes sense to me.
My body,
Responds to your touch.
Not because I need you
But my body betrays me.
You see,
The thing is.
My body wants a warm body
But my soul
Needs more than just a body.
My soul needs a love that is open
Show me your scars.
I’ll show you mine.
We can compare battle stories
Cry together
And laugh at the moments that, well,
If you look at it in that way, it’s funny.
Does that make sense?
No?
Well, it makes sense to me.
I don’t know what I want
When I say that
It doesn’t give you the right to disrespect me.
It doesn’t mean you can use me.
I know what I want
Maybe you just can’t give it to me.
Does that make sense?
No?
Well it makes sense to me.
I don’t want to explain myself
To you
Or anyone.
You see, I’ll explain
Talk and talk and talk and talk
Until I’ve used all the words
Until I’ve used every euphemism
Until I’ve used every metaphor
But if your heart is not open
To me.
Then you’ll never understand it.
My words will just be words with no meaning.
Does that make sense?
No?
Well it makes sense to me.
I am good
I am love
I am enough
Maybe not for you.
And
That’s okay.
Lotus 